The Cracks of Their Fingers

Words couldnt even begin
to describe how lonely it gets here
all alone in my head.
My only company
being my occasional
thoughts and insecurities
taunting me,
grabbing at me,
pulling me down
to places lower
than I\'d ever imagined
I\'d go.
All my friends,
yes they can be with me
and keep my exterior company.
And they can wipe away
the tears that stream
bitterly
down my cheek.
And they can hold my hand so tightly,
as if they\'re never ever going to let me go.
I could be surrounded
by thousands of millions of \'friends.\'
It could be one fucking ambush
of people who \'love\' me.
Every single one could pass me around
like some kind of ragdoll,
and each decorate me
with hugs and kisses,
and take turns
holding me tight,
tight in their arms.
And Id still manage to
slip right through
the cracks of their fingers.